F*ck tha police!

Hey boys - some good news and some bad news. Let's start with the bad. As I'm sure you've all heard by now, the po-pos shook down some poor souls trying to get a little nookie in the Meat Rack this past weekend. All we have to say is, get off our island! We're just gonna keep on keepin' on!

And in better news, HX magazine named Pines Punch "Site of the Week" in its June 20 issue! Thanks, boys! Nice to know that the gay publishing mafia is smiling down on us. We've now got our sights set on a Pulitzer.

To celebrate our HX nod, we headed out to the isle in a Bachelorette-style stretch limo (complete with lasers and strobe lights), stocked it with Bollinger and Stoli (Bolli-Stoli, darling!) and whooped it up on the LIE.

Low tea on Saturday was, quite simply, fierce.

Our new Poster Boy!

Fellow blogger Z and his boyZ

Don't fall into the harbor!

These boys invited us up to the VIP lounge

where we said hi to some friends.

Hey boys - when is Next mag naming us blog of the week?!

The new gym is coming along, um, swimmingly. Expected opening... July 4th, 2011!!
By all means, move at a glacial pace - you know how that thrills us.

Off to Middle Tea, we ran into Michael Lucas and his gaggle.
Celebs - they're just like us!

And witnessed a fire island bris.

Vito Fun was killin' with the classics!

Like Rihanna's "Umbrella"

And TLC's "Red Light Special"



He's got some loyal fans

Bring it ON!

Who wore it better?

Sing it, girl!

Woof!



We outta here!

See you this weekend!

x,
Parker Pines

HEAT WAVE

We'll get the shakes if we don't start drinking as the train pulls out of Penn Station, so we snagged a chilled bottle of rose for the train to Babylon. Too bad we forgot the corkscrew. But you think that'd stop a bunch of determined queens? Hell no.... we got all MacGyver and before we hit Jamaica, we had scooped that cork out with a key.

Success! And who says the LIRR isn't a first class experience?

What better way to start off a weekend in the Pines than stripping down and getting drunk?



With Brooklyn's finest, Larry Tee, casting his spell.

And plenty of fierce underwear...




What does it take to get a vodka stinger around here?!



a good hipster never smiles


***


Saturday was a lovely beach day ...

and we enjoyed some sashimi on the beach



before heading off to Patrick's party on Midway



Our fabulous host, holding court,


and modeling House of Duffy's latest -- layered sunglasses.






no she di'int!?!



oh yes I did!!



heyyyy!



models - dis is a competition for you, too



did we miss the Jitney to Southampton?



off to low tea, where the Ronkonkoma High School varsity swim team was bartending.


See you this weekend!

x,
Parker Pines

Work it Out, Bambi!: A Tribute to our Wildlife

Give momma a kiss!

The tick-free beauties of the Pines.

See you this weekend!

x,

Parker Pines

Adios May, Hello June

First off, can we just say that we're totally over this dreary weather. We certainly didn't drop four months' rent and starve ourselves since Easter to sit around our house in a hoodie all day. Help a gay man out, Mutha Nature! But the forecast for this coming weekend is lookin much better, so it's time to say adios to May and hello to June.

Of course, we made the best of our overcast Saturday by hitting up tea early. Those queens were gettin' a little stir-crazy from all the rain and turned out to Low Tea in droves.

We hit the bar where Sebastian poured us a few cocktails.

Meet The Britney: 1 part Absolut Citron, 1 part lemonade, 1 part peyote.

One too many Britneys?

Drunk shopping is our favorite pastime.



DJ David Marc gives us butterflies in our stomach. And he was turning it OUT!



Trail of Teas




See you this weekend!

x,
Parker Pines